Here is some of the feedback we received from participants of the recent workshop:

  Stalking the Human Form II:
A Recapitulation of Sex, Gender and Power
Los Angeles, California, UCLA
August 24, 25 & 26, 2007

Newcomers' Feedback
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From Newcomers

The workshop was on recapitulation on sex, gender, and power. Of all the areas in my life, this is an area that is most difficult and frightening for me. I kept asking myself, "Why am I putting myself through this?"

A bit on my background: I had been sexually abused …and I was deeply affected …

My ability to cope in life was very fragile, and I would continue to experience violence and disturbance within my sexual relations. I knew that I needed to find someone who could help me, but would experience difficulty in finding a professional who was willing and capable of working with me. Around that time, a friend gave me a book written by Carlos Castaneda - The Teachings of don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge. I was deeply moved by his book, and it led me to continue my quest for healing with new conviction; to never give up on my struggle.

At age twenty-four, I finally found a psychotherapist who specialized in treating adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse. I have worked with her and several other woman, for twenty years now, and have experienced tremendous progress in healing, both of myself and of many other's who share this journey with me. I also went back to school and began training in psychotherapy. I am how entering my own practice and have specialized in working with survivors.

So where does this workshop fit in? I felt compelled to explore this area within the forum of Tensegrity. I was given a challenge recently to go out there and claim myself. The community that I have worked with over the past twenty years has in some ways become a safety net. I felt this workshop offered the opportunity to face this challenge by revealing my history to people that I don't know, in an environment that I'm unfamiliar with.

My willingness to be challenged did not however, protect me from experiencing fear and uncertainty. I entered this workshop afraid that others would not be willing to hear me; they'd be uncomfortable with the topic of sexual abuse. I imaged being rejected and bolting so fast out of the room that my feet would catch fire.

This is not what actually happened; my first witness was a woman, and I started the exercise by telling her ahead of time that I was abused, and that my recapitulation will touch on these events in my past. She received me with an open heart and mind, and I soon began to feel more relaxed as I went through the recapitulation exercise. Next, I witnessed her recapitulation, and I also felt my heart open with warmth toward her. The two of us worked through several recapitulation exercises, and I left the sessions feeling grateful to have found a partner with such strength and warmth.

Then the next challenge was presented; to be witnessed by a male. I entered the session feeling again, fear. I have worked with women only; could I face being witnessed by a man with the same freedom? As my luck would have it, I was paired with two men! I took a deep breath, faced each of them, and told them that my recapitulation would touch on my past history of abuse. When I looked at both of the men, I saw tremendous warmth and openness in their eyes. I was relieved; neither of them had run away! I continued with the exercise, and in turn witnessed them. I was thrilled! I've lived through my fear and faced this challenge - not just with women, but with men!

Many practitioners presented us with their stories of their past and how they faced their own challenges. I was moved by their courage, honesty and integrity, and I felt very honoured to be a witness.

I entered the workshop hoping that I could survive it and simply get through the exercises. To my utter delight, I discovered that I more than just lived through it; I came out feeling alive; alive in my fear, alive in my body, and mostly, alive in healing.

As a newcomer, and new to the practice of Tensegrity, I was amazed at the effectiveness of the magical passes and recapitulation exercises. I could feel energy shifting in me, and found the recapitulation of past events easy to access and gain focus on. In addition, as a psychotherapist, I have a desire to continue to evolve within the profession, and this can only be done through expansion - seeking out other avenues. For me, the workshop offered possibility, and I left feeling certain that I have found a new pathway for continued growth and healing.

Thank you Cleargreen!

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