Here is some of the feedback we received from participants of the recent workshop:

  “¿Cuál es tu pesadilla? What is your nightmare?”
Bath, England
June 22, 23 & 24, 2007

 

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What an exciting workshop... First the city of Bath, with all its attractions, the nice buildings and its people, the mineral waters, the river and all the parks and open spaces around. I felt open and fluid during the time I spent there with few occasions of misalignment.

Then the workshop itself felt very easy to follow. The movements entered very deeply in my body and I had little difficulty in recollecting them afterwards. It felt that practicing for one time was enough, and then the whole series felt so familiar as if we have been practicing for ages. I was very impressed by the form of the Plumed Serpent and how it made my rib cage move and how I could feel the bones there moving too. A new sensation in the back and the chest, something stagnant made flow again releasing energy. Also the interplay between the right side and the left side along with the sounds, made a very nice difference in the states of awareness that we can be. The right side, with determination, intent and direction, and the left side, full of fluidity, perception and awareness in all directions. And those perceptions, as the form was unfolding were merging into one as a move from one side was following one of the other.

Also the witnessing exercise was very nice, if I can use this word. We sat with the witness, and in no time we were very deep in our sensations and feelings of the scenes we were describing. I found myself going deeper and deeper in layers of my fears, in the scenes I was describing, viewing their origin and how I was adopting the same fears and positions later in other occasions in my life. And this was happening as if it was the easiest thing in the world, following the flow of a dream.

I liked that the seminar had an evenly shared time between stalking and dreaming exercises. Before going out to the open fields to dream together as a group, I had discovered that place before and I was sitting there on a bench under a tree looking at this open space beyond me. I liked very much those fields and I had kept them for myself. I couldn't imagine that all of us would go and dream this scene together afterwards. At first it gave me a bit of a shock that all of us would go and sit there and absorb the scene. Then I was astonished by the fact that approximately five hundred people were sitting and gazing the fields with the same purpose and intent, to come again later in time with their dreaming attention and visit the place for as long as they liked. This was a second shock for me, that this can be possible, a dream of one person can become the dream of many others and can be shared. I was also amazed by the discipline and the quietness of all the practitioners, where all of us left the workshop hall to the fields and back, twice, and yet we were all so quiet that not a single sound or word from us was heard. This is very difficult to observe in such a big crowd under different circumstances. We all had the same intent to follow silently our common dream. It was really amazing.

The moment also where we wrote and drew our fears and the steps to get out of them on our white T-shirts was so original and so lovable. I could see the T-shirts afterwards and they were all so full of expression and originality. I couldn't believe my eyes. And all this originality in one place. I really liked that afterwards everybody stayed in their newly drawn white T-shirts and the hall had a different atmosphere, a joyous feeling of finding at least one occasion to overcome and step beyond the fears and feelings that we had been carrying for a long time. A joyous feeling of freedom. I took mine home, and I, when I wore it there, was amazed again by its originality. It was so direct and so open where I don't know if I would have drawn it by myself if I hadn't been in the workshop. We all pushed and helped each other a lot during the seminar and we moved very far and I am happy and grateful for that.

The light, affectionate and mysterious mood of the time in Bath is still present, and my sensation is, it will be for a long time, as we sort of set an anchor, this time, and learn how to access these moments again and again.

This time, I felt a strong connection to the other practitioners, for the two cohorts, I shared a hotel room before and after the workshop - we have been such an harmonic trio, moving together in a light and dreamlike understanding - and to the practitioners at the University of Bath. I liked the condition of this site, where we practiced together, then met when eating and spend the night in the same buildings. Through the stalking exercises, we changed our view and a moment later in a pause, interacted with our cohorts, which also went through this change of view. I experienced a lot of affection and conversations from a non-linear mind to another, which were very helpful to go deeper into our exploration. I felt that this affection for each other carried me on, made me more detached from my fears, and enabled me to see them more clearly. The connection continued into the night. I wanted to speak to a practitioner about a certain matter, but didn't find the time during the workshop. But then, in the night, I was dreaming this conversation.

To the stalking exercises: Friday evening, when we wrote down our fears on the right side and found other views, out of our silence and wrote them down on the left side of the page, I found it liberating to feel, how we can pull ourselves out of our mislead views, that we have this power at our hands. I can also see that it requires a daily, steady practice to maintain our new views.
In the witness conversations, I found that I am afraid to say what I want, that the other person is stronger than me, will make me act like she/he wants and will at the end hinder me, to do what I want. I can see that I am moving myself for the most part of my day in this structure. The new view from the work with the witness was that I am hindering myself much more than others do, because I am not used to taking my own intentions and ideas seriously, that is I often don't DO IT, although I am very clear about what I want or have to do. Since the workshop, I am keeping my attention on this point and DO IT. I find myself in this endeavor now and feel that I become stronger every day, and more inspired...

The strongest experience for me was the dreaming exercise of the visualizing the trees and bushes outside, going back into the hall and then return to this place. I suddenly realized that I always did this as a child and that due to this unconscious ability, I until now experienced one of my most powerful fears that "I am crazy". As a child, I often took my bicycle in the morning and went to certain places in our village, certain doors or to a hill, where I had a certain sight, which I had seen the night before in my dreams. I stood there, looked at these things and tried to "go deeper into them". As I didn't know anybody doing this, I thought, something is wrong with me. Although something in me knew what I am doing, it was not strong enough to overcome my self-consciousness and what remained is the idea, that "I am a strange, crazy person." And up to today, I find more "proofs" for this judgment: Sometimes, my thought is so strong that I project what I think in front of me. Sometimes, after I speak to a person, her or his gestures, face and movements stays with me, I see it with my body, although the person has gone. One time, in a valley, I looked at mountains, then laid down on the ground and closed my eyes, and the picture of what I just saw was still in front of me. It was beautiful... But in daily life, I am afraid of these moments of strong projections. One instructor said that dreaming needs stalking, that I need to hone my sobriety, which I feel, is completely true. I feel so liberated now, because I see a possibility to hone my ability, I had considered as my "stain" for such a long time...

There are many aspects to it, such as negative judgments of the world which also hinders me to live in a constructive way what I see as my ability, but on the workshop, in the hall on Saturday, when you asked us to return with our energy bodies to this place, I thought that this is not possible; then a thought came to me "let go, everything, just let go, more and more..." and I tried to find and follow in my body the sensation of utmost surrender... I then felt a strong movement, like a wave and I felt that I am alive, now, like being woken up from a paralyzed condition; I found it hard to speak and think and at the same time, I felt complete...

It is difficult to find words to describe the Bath Workshop…

After writing the lists of our fears and new views on Friday, I landed in a deep (unconscious) fear because I didn't manage to shift "like the others," I couldn't find new views that felt good and gave relief, I felt great anguish and dreamt that night of telling an instructor that their was some deep dark lifelong fear that I could not pinpoint, and she said it could take a long time to get free of it.

The next day we continued stalking a fear on our list, and I found an insight, but again felt no relief, I wasn't able to shift to a new feeling, a new dream.. On a superficial level I was worried about this, worried about Me and my progress, but.. and this is the weird part.. on a much deeper level I let go completely, acquiescing, jumping into the abyss of the unknown. And this was the level of the whole workshop for me.. I couldn't shift much with my conscious fears, I felt stuck and clumsy with the stalking exercises.. but.. listening to the others' stories reverberated and shifted inside in a very deep place!

This workshop was the strongest experience I've ever had of "mutual healing" - through our unity of intent and our energetic links. I felt myself being healed while hearing others and although I felt like a failure with the concrete stalking, I knew for sure that I belonged at this workshop and that my intent too was contributing to our healing. Sitting amongst the many practitioners or doing the Plumed Serpent Form, I felt at one with all, and this felt so natural and wonderful (and it is not an experience I have often or easily), like being home.. to be part of this huge hissing flying Mythic Being.. just bliss.

Miles' story... touched some fundamental part of me that was somehow just waiting for this message, this energetic jolt. It was like my true self being voiced.. and I jumped too somehow, into that abyss..

Back home in daily life, I still feel sort of split, like at the workshop.. the superficial level is stressed and stuck and I seem to be a mess.. but at a deep level I feel detached and clear.. despite my outer chaos, I find myself jumping to answer the phone instead of waiting to check who it is on the answering machine.. being generous to others with my attention and time.. and exploring paths which I never even saw before, which have given me a whole new perspective on my recent life-orientation crisis. I am really indulging in my surface fears just now, not wanting to let go of my good ol' suffering.. but I hope with time I'll be able to jump into the new dream.. Thank you all for such a precious magical workshop.

Thank you again for the extraordinary workshop! I got so many little gems that I've lost the count. For example, one realization was how my fears had stopped me and how they got me into routine acts, fearing to lose this or that until I was afraid to move at any direction. I noticed also how my fears are at times very clever, they disguise themselves, using reason to convince me that it's better that I don't do this or that.

Story of Miles about commitment was like a hit of a hammer for me, it still haunts me. I took it so personally, because the story reflect so perfectly my moods and fears. A true commitment was a fear that I somehow "forgot" to write on T-shirt because it was too scary thought to think of! A true commitment which includes possibility that I might have to do things which doesn't give ME instant satisfaction and pleasure or doesn't serve ME. But now I have new tools to keep the fighting going on and I'm grateful to you all practitioners and instructors!

As we were doing the stick/dowel pass, as preparation to go out to the field on Sunday, I experienced the impulse to jump out of my body. This urge came up 2 or 3 times. And each time my immediate reaction was to suppress it.

A similar experience happened at a seminar in Mexico City a long time ago. The seminar started with an introductory lecture by Florinda Donner. The whole group of attendees surrounded the stage on one end of the hall, sitting down to listen to Florinda Donner's lecture. Because it was the first time I saw her, I was very curious about her and what she had to say.

During the lecture my attention was suddenly drawn to some thing(s) which were gliding on the wall of the hall with considerable speed. It was as if I was looking at them, but not with my eyes. I was watching those thing(s) with the area just below my belly button. I followed them moving on the wall, and when those things arrived to the back of the hall, I jumped out of my body through the top of my head, stretched my wings (which I then realized had always been neatly folded on my back exactly like the wings of a bird) and swooped/jumped over the crowd to the opposite end of the hall.

I was there in my other body at the back of the hall for (what felt like) a short time, while the lecture was continuing. Although I don't remember what happened there.

What I do remember is that I suddenly realized that my physical body was still sitting in the crowd that was listening to the lecture. At that moment I began to perceive both places at the same time. I noticed that in that state of divided perception, the perception of each place was dim. As if you have a certain amount of light/awareness which shines dimmer when you divide it over two places.

Only then did I become aware of the weirdness of the situation. I became anxious and jumped back into my physical body. The lecture was continuing as if none had noticed.

The part of me that jumped out of my body wasn't ready to sit still. It was so excited that it wanted to jump out in all kinds of directions. For fear of losing control I had reacted by tensing my whole body, and squeezing it a little to the ground, and thereby restraining it. The same thing I would do years later in Bath.

This fear of losing control of the world was connected to a period in my childhood, approximately from the age of 10-12 years.

The most extraordinary things would happen. For instance, I would wake up in a different version of this world, which wasn't static. Ripples would go through the whole time and space of a room. My parents would be frightening, phony smiling projections. At the time, those experiences were simply too weird for me. None had another explanation than that they were nightmares (the mostly occurred in the evening or at night). I thought I was losing my grip of the reality and feverishly tried to hold on to it.

I suppressed these experiences with the greatest effort and in exactly the same way I later suppressed my other body jumping out; by tensing the whole body, especially the belly, neck, buttocks, feet, holding my breath. Sometimes this wasn't enough. Something unstoppable would keep on shifting in me. My last resort was to go to my parents and sleep in between them in their bed.

Looking back I believe that these experiences were enhanced by yet another set of experiences during the day. During a certain period I was being teased by a groups of children at my school. Perhaps because I had red hair and was very religious like my parents; they selected me as their object of teasing. This group would chase me around, on and outside the school premises during every break. Although they would never catch me, I would be on the run every break for maybe a year, terrified they would catch me and hurt me. It was almost like a game where they were the hunters and I was their game. But everyone involved, especially me, took the game deadly serious.

This went on until the headmaster of that school caught me, during one of those breaks, being away of the school premises. Being off the school premises wasn't allowed and I had to report to him in his office after the break. When I reported at his office, I broke down, I confessed what was happening. I expected him to punish those bullies. But he didn't. He told me that punishing those bullies wouldn't really solve the issue. He said: 'You can't always keep running. At a certain time you have to stand and fight'. He proceeded to give me punishment for leaving the school grounds, as not to give the impression he had chosen my side.

The next break when I was allowed again to go outside, I confronted that groups of kids that was chasing me. I challenged the strongest boy, who also practiced martial arts, for a fight. In the fight that followed, I won by forcing him to the ground, until he surrendered. I continued to do this. Challenge and fight everyone that teased me. It even extended to my friends. When I would see a bully harass one of my friends or my little brother, I would simply jump on top of them. It made me feel exhilarated.

At the time I thought I had conquered all my fears. Now I realize I conquered just one fear (of fighting), and replaced it with others; Fear for losing control, and fear of how others judge me.

The Bath workshop was quite something. I have never before experienced anything like the dreaming together. I don't really understand what happens as we all only hold a small part of the whole and would like to understand what it is we created or experienced. I felt in the dreaming together that I was actually at the temple moving to the music.

Also, holding the picture of being outside the sports hall seems an astonishing experience. When we formed a crescent on Saturday and used the dowel, I had the sensation that our group was actually flying and that the crescent was a thing in itself. I could picture the faces of the people in my crescent (and still can, although we never even spoke). It is as if our being a crescent exists somewhere still. This is neither a pleasant or unpleasant feeling - it just IS in itself. The picture that I hold of my portion of the landscape and the sounds I recall seem to be still unusually clear and I can easily recall them and go there, especially if I use the dowel.

During the workshop, when we were writing on our T-shirts, I couldn't at first think of anything to
write, even though I had a long list of fears. I then wrote 'I don't have to be like my family, I only have to be like myself'. It seems that since the end of the workshop that I am becoming more myself and that I don't have to be constantly trying to please other people. Last week, I had arranged to meet a friend and she had changed the arrangements. Usually I would have agreed to the alternate ones even though the new arrangements were not convenient to me. On this occasion, I suggested that we find an alternative time that was good for me also. I find the same thing at home and at work. It is difficult to explain - it is almost a kind of 'take it or leave it' attitude, but not in an arrogant or offhand way. I wore my t-shirt to sleep in - literally close to my heart!

I am writing to you because I had two dreams related to the Bath seminar
that might be of some interest.

On Saturday 23rd, when I arrived in the field were we sat in silence at the Bath seminar
I realized I had dreamed this scene recently. It wasn't a 'deja vu' but a real dream I had written down. The feeling was so strong that I started to laugh (quietly) and told myself:
You must really be a good Dreamer then!
May I hear a loud sound now to confirm this has really happened...
At this precise moment two birds that sounded like seagulls flew over and made loud sounds that seemed as if they were laughing too...but of course this is my interpretation, I guess.

Below is a copy of this dream I had written down which happened in this field.

Dream: Sunday 8 April 2007

I was in a park, enjoying my break during a Tensegrity seminar. It wasn't a lunch break because no one was eating but just a long break when everybody was quiet. I was with my father and he was arguing that the techniques presented at the seminar were on the verge of 'madness'. I told him that it was madness to be afraid of finding out about freedom. I started to fly and immediately and went over some high fences with barbwire. As I flew over I was saying: "Is it madness to be free?"

My dad then disappeared and I focused on my fellow Tensegrity practitioners and went to the middle of the field were the grass was.

I realized that there were many practitioners about and I waved at them shouting: Now, Here, look up, look around we are free, free to fly, free to be conscious".

At this point at said to myself:
"I am conscious, I am Dreaming, I am Dreaming!" I then remembered that I had practiced how to control my Dream and said loudly: "I call all my Dreaming attention NOW".

I felt calm and enjoyed the freedom of Dreaming even more because I knew that no matter how exciting it was I remained detached and in harmony. Every time the images seemed to become blurred I would say: "I call all of my Dreaming attention NOW" and the Dream would become a real world.

I noticed a strange giant yellowish flower that seemed to have nothing to do with the rest. I was attracted to it but something told me that this would be a 'scout' or some kind of opening to a new level of Dreaming were I wouldn't necessarily be able to remain conscious, so I ignored it.
At my surprise I found myself calling for the moon to help me even if it was the afternoon:
"I call the moon to help be aware and in full power". At this precise moment the moon appeared through the clouds and stood there in the sky . A connection to my umbilical region was made and my power was increased. Not only was I free to experience the scene I was part of, I knew I could change my Dream and have a creative part in what I was experiencing.

This park was indeed the Dreaming field in Bath!

The second dream happened on the weekend of the Palm Springs seminar, the seminar that was much like the one given in Bath.

I had heard of this seminar but I had not planned to attend it so I totally forgot what the dates were. Nevertheless one weekend I kept on dreaming of being at a seminar. The last day I had the following awesome dream:

Dream: Sunday 4 February 2007

I was in ancient Mexico in a large place with some pyramids and there was some special celebration there. Many people attended and many were dressed for the occasion. The priests prepared me and I was with other people who, like me, knew they were going to be initiated.

Some very powerful beings arrived and seemed from another planet.

Finally Quetzalcoatl himself arrived wearing his full head dress and strange costume. He emanated powerful fiery energy. He put on my head a complex helmet with long feathers. Telepathically I was told that this was a device for me to tune better to Spirit. Then other people received other initiations and the festivities carried on. The morning after I could feel this energy all around me and I could hear energetic sounds all around.

The relaying of these two dreams is not to celebrate my own genius or to pretend I am special...sometimes I don't Dream for a month or two!

This is to let you know that whatever you are doing, it works! The intent is strong and you are building something powerful that can be felt over time and space. Your good work really pays off and is changing people's lives positively. I am very grateful.

The workshop…oh, now it seems like a dream... a beautiful dream of freedom and affection and joy… sharing this dream with others, wonderful, beautiful dreamers… in a green, hilly landscape, under swiftly changing skies of grey, silver, white and blue. In that dream, we were guided into yet another dream… of a Mexican city, Teotihuacán … where I was escorted to an abyss, in which I jumped, into a swirling fog, and became a red feathered bird! Another practitioner told me that she was dancing so happily with the people there and they were shaped as sticks… And I know this city! and I live(d) there! and there we were all so different from what we are now, we knew all the time that we came from the stars! We carry that knowledge in our heart and it permeates every act we perform. And we knew that we lived shortly on this heartbreaking beauty, splendor, refinement, wildness, supersupersupercreativity and supersupersuperlove of planet Earth.

I changed my inner dialogue from: "Oh, I cannot dream. Others are doing it, and I can't. I'm so behind. And I practice for so long…and still I fail …" into: "I am a dreamer! Just like you!"

The Bath workshop was very powerful indeed. It brought an integration on many levels simultaneously . The pass "Jumping into the Abyss" and the not-doings "Legs Rule Vitality" enabled me to stalk through conscious and unconscious fears, the "Plumed Serpent Form", the dreaming and visualization exercises brought forth a spirit of exploration and unification: to unify with myself, others and something that is greater than all of us.

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